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Man’s 15 hilarious ‘EYE OPENING’ observations after living with girl roommates
Last year, I moved in with my girlfriend and her best mate. They’re both girls. Some of the stuff I’ve seen is EYE OPENING!

1. They show each other ALL of the messages that they receive from everybody. Nobody is safe. Girls don’t need screenshots mate, they have photographic screenshot memories.

2. Contrary to popular belief, girls do poo. And they ain’t scared to talk about it mate. “I NEED A POO” is probably the most used phrase in this house.

3. HAIR CLIPS. Oh my days, the hair clips. Stand on them, sit on them, wake up with them attached to your skin, mate I could have a bath in the ones I find on a weekly basis.

4. The process for getting ready for a night out is not just “wash, get dressed, go out”. Nah. There’s meetings, catwalk shows, endless compliments and it’s sometimes an actual 2 man job because some dresses have back zips that would literally be impossible for one girl to reach mate.

5. Candles. We have SO MANY CANDLES. Candles that smell like really weird things, like “rhubarb and custard”. I don’t even know what rhubarb and custard actually smells like?!?

6. Kardashians. Ibiza Weekender. Ru Paul. Ex On The Beach. Love Island. Geordie Shore. Mate, I know everything about all of these people I’ll never meet. There are SO MANY EPISODES OF THEM ALL! And the worst thing is, I actually gave in and really got into Love Island.

7. If my eyebrows aren’t “fleeky”, they literally don’t talk to me until I agree to let one of the girls pluck them. It’s mad. Girls love plucking someone else’s eyebrows. No idea why!!

8. Girls go on and on about dieting and “bikini bodies” etc, but trust me when I say that “cheat day” is pretty much whenever they feel sad about anything. Bad day? Glass of wine. Is it Monday? Chocolate. Did your boyfriend tell you we can’t have a dog? Dominos.

9. I know that the saying goes, “girls find out everything”, but if that’s true it’s only because they are NEXT LEVEL Instagram stalkers. Seriously I mention a first name, after 5 mins on Insta they know the person’s dog’s name, their shoe size and their national insurance number.

10. Dressing gowns. If you haven’t got a dressing gown then you are missing out mate. Some days when we’re hungover, we literally don’t get out of dressing gowns all day. The girls go Tesco in dressing gowns and nobody even cares.

11. Sometimes I sit on the sofa and just watch those two, sometimes they just look and break out in to dance or something. I literally have no idea what’s going on, there doesn’t even have to be any music playing.

12. Everything is a massive drama. Having to wash your hair = drama. It being cold outside when you expected warm and you have to change your outfit = drama. Not being able to find an item of clothing = absolutely massive drama.

13. If visitors come round, we have to know 8-10 working days beforehand so the girls can make sure that the house is clean, they’ve washed and dried their hair and they have makeup on.

14. Girls share all of the clothes. They might as well have a shared wardrobe. It’s actually gone past the point of them knowing whose top is whose lol!

15. There is so much hair everywhere mate, it’s mad. Especially around the shower, just little clumps of hair. Am used to it now though.

All I would say though is that you don’t know true loyalty until you’ve lived with girls. And the house is full of laughter every day. I love them.

via Craig Shapes Haywar, Canterbury, Kent.

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Credits: Craig Shapes Haywar
681 views Apr 4, 2018

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